Hoo boy, them movies

               After reading up on it, I think I won’t go see Batman V (really, you ran out of letters?) Superman. I’ve seen Deadpool and the latest Star Wars in full glory and .. I mean, come on, I have to offend some people by saying there’s a few (more than a few, actually) things I don’t like about The Force Awakens. I loved Deadpool though, I think with less blood and less brains flying into the air it would have been perfect. No, the jokes stay. You know why I won’t be going to BvS? Darkness.

               Come on, folks, get a grip. If I were to love realism and darkness and existential questions I’d have a blast just living my life or watching the bloody news. I’m also quite sure most people sort of feel the same. Star Wars I didn’t like because, even if it was so bloody long, it felt like it was shot in London. Apart from the opening scenes, everything feels like it’s just a couple kilometers apart. You have a 200 meter spaceship leaving the orbit of a planet and boom!, the right people manage to find it in real time (never explained how, by the way). Everybody’s close. Everybody sees the new and improved Deathstar firing its pecker, even if they’re supposedly half a galaxy away. Decidedly not so fun, a movie twice as long only explaining half the important things. Buy a book and find the answers? You bloody buy it, then.

               Deadpool? Well, that fellow cracked me up. Nothing’s sacred, not even International Women’s Day, which scene by the way is one to hide from my wife. He makes fun of himself, of life, of reality, of everything. It’s stress-reducing, in my book. I don’t have to look around and worry, because I know it ain’t real. He knows it too, which only serves to bring us closer. Hell, if I were to narrate that movie, that’d be the way to go. Humor makes his world certainly not my own, which is good, because who bloody needs twice the trouble, anyway?

               But that’s that, innit? Darkness, gritty actions and realism would only give me more nightmares, so why go for it?


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